My dajie (means eldest sister in Chinese), whom I loved most among my siblings, passed away recently.
Dajie suffered all through her life. She was born during the World War II. Life was very tough, coupled with the arrival of many siblings, close to one another. Being the eldest in the family, she shouldered the most responsibility of helping up my mother;she also bore the blunt of my mother’s bad temper. By the age of seven while her peers were looking forward to their first day in school, my dajie already helped my mother to tap the rubber trees and farming.
Life after married was equally tough. She had to put up with a mother-in-law who was very steep in Chinese traditions. Besides her four children, she had to take care of the four siblings of her husband. She never given a birthday treat or a mother’s day celebration throughout her life.
Dajie has many talents and her memory is superb. Despite been deprived of any former education, she learnt everything on her own such as sewing, writing. I had sweet memories of my childhood days because of her. She would sew beautiful dresses for me, taught me Chinese when I was very young. There was also those Shaw Brothers’ Chinese movie treats when she received pocket monies from my mother.
The last six months of her life was terrible, having to endure the severe pain and the side effects of the strong painkillers. We wanted to put her in a nursing home as it had become increasingly difficult for her to manage on her own. She hesitated till the last two days of her life. Such is her perseverance, endurance and selflessness.
My bonding with this sister is so deep and strong that the only force that is powerful enough to cut short such bond is death. Time will heal my grief and the void of my heart, but I am glad that her suffering and sorrow are finally over. She is now in God’s warm, loving embrace. One day we shall meet again.
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