Gender differences

"And the Lord God said, 'It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him" (Genesis 2:18 )

I find the research on gender differences on the whole does not really tell us what we do not know. Rather, they merely validate what we knew and experienced personally. Take for example the following observations:

1    The seat of a woman's soul is her emotions. A woman usually believes you know her when you know what she feels. But the seat of a man's soul is his intent or purpose. That's why when a woman bares her soul by disclosing her feelings to him, she gets frustrated because he doesn’t acknowledge and recognize that as significant. For him, baring the soul means sharing his hopes and dreams. Men do not accuse each other of not caring about feelings.

2      Men tend to take words more literally and to hear them in more sweeping terms. So their self-esteem can be wounded if women used words loosely.

3      In order to make the guy tune in to her intentions, she has to show (action) rather than tell.

4    Men tend to resist change. In fact, one of the most prized characteristics of a man's friendship with other men is total acceptance. When a woman begins to encourage a man to live up to his potential, he can misunderstand that as her overall dissatisfaction with him. He may initially improve according to her suggestions, but later he becomes slower to respond till one day when she inadvertently steps on his self-esteem, she loses her significant influence. He becomes emotional distant, stops connecting and doesn’t care what she thinks any more.

5    It is important to emphasize a man’s positive qualities for that is in fact acknowledging the complete picture of who he is.

Such research can still be helpful in the sense that with the understanding of the differences in the psychological make-up of man and woman, we can use this knowledge wisely so as to minimize and manage conflicts in any relationships.