Prayers

A young unmarried woman has been constantly prayed in the weekly church prayer meeting for a husband. ‘Lord, give me a husband.’ She would pray and then sit down. Her pastor tried to help her towards praying for others as well by saying this to her: ‘It’s all right to pray for a husband, but you need to broaden your prayer life. Pray for other people as well as yourself.’ In the next prayer meeting, the woman got up and prayed:’ Lord, please give my mother a son-in-law.’

A prayer item appeared in the Sunday bulletin of a liberal church which read: ‘Lord, we have done the best under difficult circumstances. We have been badly influenced by our homes and environment, so deal lightly with our lapses. Grant us the power to live harmless lives full of self-respect. Amen.’

Wise or Clever

‘Blessed is the one who finds wisdom, and the one who gets understanding, for the gain from her is better than gain from silver and her profit better than gold. She is more precious than jewels, and nothing you desire can compare with her. Long life is in her right hand; in her left hand are riches and honor. Her ways are ways of pleasantness, and all her paths are peace. ‘ (Proverbs 3:13-17)

S. Chesterman in his article ‘Why study’, thinks that when one chooses a course of study, it is better to be guided by passion than other reasons such as what the parents wanted him to be or on financial potential. It is true that good universities may be good at educating clever people but do not necessary make them wise.

The dictionary defines ‘wise’ as having or showing experience, knowledge, and makes good judgment. Hence the main difference between wise and clever lies in the words ‘good judgment’. Wisdom often gains from within oneself over time as a person takes responsible choices in life. I agreed that we have to have passion in everything we do as it is a very strong motivational force that keeps us going in the long run. If we look around us, it is a kind of sad to see quite a handful of people ended up in careers that they ‘hated’. Imagine how many more people would have added to this category if all the bright students got into their dream course of study (business administration) and dream career (banking) shortly before Lehman Brothers debacle!

One needs courage to carry out what he thinks it is wise as it may even look foolish in the eyes of many. I still remember my pre-university school mate who made the ‘unthinkable’ decision at that point of time, to switch from science stream to arts stream. He went on to become a very successful lawyer.

A story is told about a wise elderly woman who has a beautiful bird named Agape. One day, two young men decided to break into her house while she was away and steal her bird. When she returned, they would approach her and say, “Old woman, we have your bird. Is it dead or alive?” If the old woman replied “dead,” they would open their hands and let the bird fly away. If the old woman replied “alive,” they would crush the bird and drop it at the feet of the elderly woman. Just as the two young men planned, they approached the elderly woman and said, “Old woman, we have your bird. Is it dead or alive?” The wise, elderly woman paused a moment and looked at the ground. Then, she answered slowly,” I don’t know….The only thing I know is that it is in your hands. It is in your hands.”

We too hold in our hands the consequences of our own decisions. We have to take responsibility not just for the good choices, but also for the poor choices.

Female Relationships

'Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!'(Ecclesiastes 4:9-10)

I think one thing great about being a woman is that we have many girlfriends to turn to in time of need. For a woman, her relationships with her girlfriends help her to deal with stress and difficult life experiences. The quality “girlfriend time" helps her to generate serotonin, a kind of neurotransmitter which can combat depression and create a general feeling of well being. Talking about problems is useful as getting someone else’s view can sometimes help us to understand the issues from a new perspective.

Women build relationships through sharing of feelings and personal lives whereas men often do through activities. Women tend to invest more time and are more committed to develop friendships. That explains why they developed more lasting friendships than men. So hanging out with friends is not a waste of time and unproductive as commonly perceived. As for me, my girlfriends are the ones who walked with me throughout this difficult season of my life. God always uses people in our lives to help us steer through storms in life. For that, I am thankful to God for the girlfriends I have!

Cholesterol result

‘You who have made me see many troubles and calamities will revive me again; from the depths of the earth you will bring me up again.’ (Psalm 71:20)

Before I got my cholesterol result, I am very confident that my LDL has gone down, but the question in my mind is by how much. After all, the last two months has seen me cut down fish intake to one-quarter, exercise 5 times a week (half-an hour each), and eat plenty of fruits and veggies. As a result, I lost 2 kilos during this period. Here are the results:-

Cholesterol 4.4 (6.7)    : below 5.2 mmol/L (desirable range)

Triglycerides 1.2 (1.0)  : below 1.7

HDL 1.4 (1.2)              : below 1.5

LDL 2.5 (5.1)              : below 3.3

I more than hit my targets! Before seeing the doctor, I spent 45 minutes with the dietician who gave me some very useful tips on how to maintain a healthy cholesterol level. I learnt that there is a limit as to how much one can use diets to control his cholesterol as that constitutes only 30% in contrast to our liver which produces 70% of the cholesterol in our body system. So genetic factor can be a primary cause of high cholesterol rather than what a person eats. Statin is so effective in managing cholesterol because it works through liver. I am convinced my condition has to do with genetic factor or my hysterectomy.

I am still on Statin (low dosage) and will go for review in four months’ time.

CT Scan & blood test results

'Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, shall guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.' (Philippians 4:6-7)

'Health is not valued till sickness comes.'(Thomas Fuller)

My CT scan result shows that my left gastric node is stable while my cancer marker readings (CA125,CA19-9,CEA)are more or less the same as 6 months ago. Since the node remains about the same size as it was first discovered in May 2011 scan, I have to go for scan only in a year's time instead of half-yearly, bearing unforeseen circumstances.

God has not finished with me yet. He still has tasks for me to do. Thanks for His amazing grace and mercy.

C T Scan

“Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, and faithful in prayer.” (Romans 12:12)

Yesterday afternoon I went for the scheduled CT scan and cancer marker blood tests (the last ones about six months ago). Even though I had went through such scan several times (to be exact, 6 rounds), I still felt uneasy when they injected dye into my body. I could experience the warmness in my body as the dye travelled into my bloodstream, and the sensation akin to poison. I was also fearful that I might be allergic to the dye. Before the scan begun, one has to drink 3 big cups of special drink, which was another unpleasant thing.

I will get my report next Wednesday when I see my oncologist.

Passionate Love vs Compassionate Love

'Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for those who love, time is eternity.' (Henry Van Dyke)

Today is Valentine"s Day. What a thing to talk about passionate and companionate love.!  Rightfully love does not need a specific date to express. We ought to express love on every occasion. It should be an everyday affair. Unfortunately love is such a time-consuming activity, with busyness and worries of life take us far away from it. More and more we need to be reminded about love. This is especially true for couples who have married to each other for some years.

Studies show that couples enjoy a big happiness boasts that lasts on the average for only 2 years. It is passionate kind of love. After that, the special joy starts to wear off when familiarity breeds contempt, or in some cases, indifference to one another. Of course, other forces come to play too such as change in expectations, careers and bringing up children. When couples become so familiar to each other as a sibling, we can cease to be attractive to one another. The danger is when one starts to crave for variety and novelty. So every marriage needs to rebuild in order to strive. In reality, there is no such thing as ‘marriage made in heaven’.

All is not lost. Studies show that couples can have another chance of marriage bliss- i.e. when their children moved out of the family home. The empty nest offers abundant opportunities for them to rediscover and surprise each other. That love becomes more companionate in nature. If they failed to make use of this opportunity, that’s the end of the road for their marriage. Regrettably, many couples at this stage choose to become indifference to one another instead. To me, this is the greatest threat to any marriage. I would rather have quarrels or disagreements than to endure indifference, which is really a mental torture.

Trials

"It's wonderful what God can do with a broken heart, if He gets all the pieces." (Samuel Chadwick)

Early this week I suddenly received a message from my daughter’s tutor that she has to stop giving tuition with immediate effect as she is not feeling well and is in low spirit. We do not know exactly what happened, be it her health issues or family matters. Nevertheless, it must be quite serious to cause her to make such an abrupt decision.

Indeed, trial can come any moment in our lives and no one can run away from it. What matters most is not so much what happens to us, but how we deal with it. In fact, people make surprised and big discoveries in time of darkness in their lives.We gain the right perspective on many things when we are brought down to our knees. It is said that sometimes a dark tunnel is the shortest way round a hill.

I am particularly inspired by Mary Stevenson’s poem, “Footprints in the Sand”. Mary was born in a big family. She lost her mother at the age of six. Most of her childhood was spent during The Great Depression. When she was sixteen she entered into an abusive marriage that resulted in her having to run away and finding refuge with her infant son.Inspired by the many things that had affected her life, she wrote this beautiful poem. May those who are in distress gain strength and comfort from it in their time of need.

                          One night I dreamed I was walking
                          along the beach with the Lord.
                          Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
                          In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
                          Sometimes there were two sets of footprints, 
                          other times there were one set of footprints.
                         This bothered me because I noticed that
                         during the low periods of my life,
                         when I was suffering from anguish, sorrow or defeat,
                         I could see only one set of footprints.
                         So I said to the Lord,
                         "You promised me Lord, that if I followed you,
                         you would walk with me always.
                         But I have noticed that
                        during the most trying periods of my life,
                        there have only been one set of footprints in the sand.
                        Why, when I needed you most,
                        you have not been there for me?"
                        The Lord replied,
                        "The times when you have seen only one set of footprints,
                        is when I carried you."

 (Mary Stevenson)